The Descent: From Curiosity to Compulsion My compulsive journey began at 16 through peer influence, though I'd adamantly condemned masturbation as degenerate since childhood. Paradoxically, pornography had infiltrated my world at 13. When home internet arrived, I cautiously explored adult content - initially twice monthly with intense guilt, clinging to textbook warnings about "vice prohibitions" while lacking deeper understanding.

During middle school (14-15 years old), I weaponized crude humor about teachers and video game characters as social currency. Though inwardly repulsed, I compulsively participated in sexualized banter while neglecting studies. This moral erosion isolated me - classmates sensed the inauthenticity, responding with mockery that deepened my social anxiety. Depression and OCD symptoms emerged, though masturbation hadn't yet started. My essence had already corroded.

The turning point came through a gaming buddy at 15. Bonding over shared virtual worlds, he introduced hardcore pornography at his home. By 16, he normalized masturbation as recreational. Surrounded by peers embracing this "harmless release," I discarded remaining inhibitions. What began as experimentation spiraled into an 8-year addiction lasting through college graduation.

The Toll Pre-addiction, I possessed exceptional cognitive abilities - teachers marveled at my photographic memory and rapid text processing (6-7 lines per glance). This gifted mind crumbled post-16. Despite entering a top-tier high school ranked initially in the top 10%, my cerebral capacity deteriorated with escalating compulsion.

The mechanics became grotesque:(Free Pron Hub/pron/sexpron/pron videos/pron gif)

Daily 3x sessions for 3 consecutive years (1,000+ total)

Imitating pornographic scenarios through humping bedding

Progressive erectile dysfunction - urologists noted "worse performance than 70-year-olds"

Physical collapse mirrored mental ruin:

Climbing stairs required handrail support

Walking induced breathlessness with "ghost-like" unsteady gait

Severe neurosis cluster: attention fragmentation, OCD loops, debilitating anxiety

Academic freefall culminated in dark irony - while peers studied obsessively senior year, I alternated between compulsive release and depressive hibernation. Miraculously, ancestral grace granted admission to a public university through residual intelligence. Had I remained clean, elite institutions would have been attainable. (Free Pron Hub/pron/sexpron/pron videos/pron gif)